March 3rd

So I was just talking to Katie on the internet about how I can't sleep right now and she was like "yeah me too." and I was wishing I could just go over there for a few minutes and have someone to have a deep conversation and snuggle up with. I could totally do that with her - just drop in and say hi and leave 20 minutes later, but the problem is 125 miles is a bit far for a 20 minute visit. Sigh, I wish I had a friend like that in Logan. I was hoping for something like that in my last ex girlfriend, but it seemed like any time we'd see each other we'd just make out rather than visit and enjoy each others company. I suppose other than being Aggie basketball fans though, we didn't really have all that much in common. I liked to pretend like we did, but .. eh .. Anyway, gaining a friend like that locally didn't work out so well for me.

I suppose there are my roommates and I could just go talk or hang out with them. Maybe I should. I get along with them all really well, but they're all kinda busy elsewhere and besides being that I'm a straight male it's almost weird to have that kind of connection with other straight males and I certainly wouldn't want to snuggle up next to any of them. Yuck! I don't know why I'm complaining, I have lots of friends - I just feel like I don't have a special friend that I have some kind of bond or attachment with and I really want that... in a more local sense than 125 miles away. I miss Emily back before she got too cool, and preoccupied with any boy who said hi to her, to hang out with me. Though I guess in a sense it's probably my own fault for trying to date her, but it kind of became the only way I could get attention from her. Now that we don't date I see her maybe once every other month. Though I suppose I kind of quit putting effort into that friendship about 3 months ago. That was stupid of me.

I met a girl at a basketball game last night. She was cute, older (like 22) and acted mature! We talked pretty much the whole game - she was really nice and so I'm like "see you at the next game right?" (there is one this weekend) and she's like "of course!" Later that night we became facebook friends and I saw she had a boyfriend - dammit. Every girl in Logan who is decent to look at and has normal social skills is married by 20. Well no, I guess this girl proves me wrong, but she has a boyfriend so I suppose it doesn't matter anyway. It's a poor generalization, but you get the idea.

I guess today was just a frustrating day for me socially and I kind of wanted to vent.

Hey in better news I seem to be passing all of my classes and the career fair is tomorrow. Hopefully I can impress some companies and maybe get a summer position doing something useful. Anyway, think I'll go watch some Enterprise and chat to Katie a little longer.